FYI here are those Christopher Willard bawdy haikus Julie Marden mentioned in her introduction to her co-author in the Novel-in-a-Box contest. (Weirdly enough, I tried to post this link on the NC Facebook page and it was rejected or turned down or whatever because some Facebook users had reported it as offensive–to me that sounds like a recommendation. Okay, a third attempt proved successful. Must have been a glitch and not evidence of narrow mindedness. Ah, the life of an NC editor.)
For some unaccountable reason, this reminds me of a limerick recited by Olivier in a PBS dramatization of John Fowles’s The Ebony Tower:
There was a young lady named Gloria
Who was had by Sir Gerald du Maurier
Then Hippolyte Taine
Sir Gerald again
And the band at the Waldorf Astoria
I’m highly offended by this turn into the world of sexual innuendo. I’m either going to report you to the web-police or…offer my own limerick.
There once was a blogger named Glover
Whose website became rather vulgar
Please ‘Bubbles’ don’t wank
Here on Numero Cinq
Or we’ll never get our prize Talisker.
I just wish Chris would send in the missing lines of that last haiku…